Have You Met Jonah?
Have you met Jonah? He’s the quintessential office suck up. But Jonah is not a bad sort. Oh no. Jonah comes across as being very amiable, friendly and of course quite religious. He takes pride in not indulging in the vices that other men partake in. He dresses well, appears focused and says yes to everything.
And herein lies Jonah’s downfall. Because he cannot say no to the boss. Because he feels that is how he should work. That saying no, means he is incompetent and inefficient. And knowing very well that he cannot deliver what is asked, he keeps saying yes. And the boss knows this. The boss knows that Jonah is bullshitting. But the boss has an ego. As do all men of power. And so the boss does not want to admit to himself that he needs to pull up Jonah for saying yes to everything. Because the boss likes commanding that level of power where a no becomes a yes just to please and appease.
And so Jonah continues on his haphazard trajectory. And when the time comes, despite Jonah’s inability to deliver on time or in full, he is able to report to the boss whenever he deems the boss should be in the know of something. Not that the boss asked, or that the boss needed to know, but Jonah needed to report. And hence he is the quintessential office snitch. Because he knows his job is protected that way. Jonah can do all wrong but when he gives the boss the report, then all that wrong is erased and forgotten.
This attitude is sad because Jonah can never progress beyond a point of kissing some boss’s feet and boot licking to survive. It is the epitome of the subaltern in the annals of the historic framework that saw the vassal and the feudal Lord play their little survival games where eventually Jonah loses. And the next Jonah will be groomed and perpetuated.